Candy Crush

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It has started. The Candy Crush of the world of retail. Halloween is only 40 days away. I’m sure the Halloween candy has been out since early September, but I’ve tried to avert my gaze. From here on out, we’ll be in for about seven months of Candy Crush. The candy companies have taken over the holidays we celebrate…it seems that’s all they’re about. And each year they come out with the holiday themed candies earlier and earlier, so that now, it’s all a Willy Wonka blur.

It dawned on my last winter that we have these seven months of straight holidays that have candy associated with them, and then we have a sort of candy break over the summer months. Halloween is all about the candy now…who cares if you have the best costume or the best-decorated yard? It’s all about what you are handing out to fill those pillow cases and pumpkin buckets. And how much candy are you giving?

Then we move into Thanksgiving…chocolate turkeys (a take-off on the Easter Bunny, I’m sure), and the candy corn left from Halloween can be considered a dual-holiday fall candy. We’re not so interested in giving thanks and sharing a meal with family as we are with pleasing the children by providing them with plenty of sugar.

Then comes Christmas with all of its Santas, reindeer, and candy canes. M&M’s turn from orange, yellow, and brown to red, green and white. Stockings are filled with sugary treats, and gingerbread houses are shingled and sided with tasty nuggets of pure sugar.

January provides a bit of a break to recover from your sugar coma, but then watch out! Here comes Valentine’s Day! Candy conversation hearts, boxes of chocolate, candy roses, and heart-shaped red hots. M&M’s drops the green and keeps the red and white. What better way to say I love you than with some chocolate, right?

March brings us St. Patrick’s Day, complete with all that the leprechauns can carry…gold chocolate coins, green-tinted marshmallow candies, and shamrock-shaped lollipops. Re-enter the green M&M’s, and drop the red.

And then, in April we are bombarded with chocolate bunnies, marshmallow eggs, jelly beans, and Peeps. And much like the M&M’s, Peeps have spread into other holidays…ghosts and pumpkins for Halloween, and snowmen and Christmas trees for Christmas.

But once your Easter Basket is empty, you’ll have to wait until October to start down the road to diabetes again.

Oh sure, there’s the candy they throw at all the parades, and the s’more-making candy, but that’s really about it for the summer. I wonder if it takes the candy companies those 5 months to come up with all the candy they’ll need to get through the next Candy Crush.

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One response »

  1. Your post makes my toothache…my tummy ache and my sugar antennae raise to new heights…. you are right, that much candy from now until Easter… and then 6 months of withdrawl… it’s a conspiracy.

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