Smarties Don’t Snort Smarties


A friend just forwarded me a link to a story about middle school kids snorting Smarties, the lovely little candies that come in a roll wrapped in cellophane. Yes, it seems that they are mimicking adults snorting cocaine, and think they might get some sort of high from crushing up these candies and snorting a sweet line. Apparently, there are even YouTube videos of these kids snorting Smartie lines. This is disturbing on so many levels.


But there’s more…apparently, once these kids have been snorting the crushed candies, the bits of sugary sweetness get stuck in their nasal passages, and then attract flies, which lay eggs, which sprout into maggots, which live in the nasal passages, causing all sorts of problems. Parents are being alerted to pay attention to any tickling sensation in the nose, foul smell coming from the nose, or nasty mucous coming from the nose or eyes. Yeah, maggots don’t usually come along without a lot of baggage.


Maggots are not the only risk involved here. The shards of candy can cut the nasal passages, causing scarring. The candies can also cause coughing, wheezing, or other respiratory issues, as well as infections. Of course, there’s the risk that your kid is the one who happens to be allergic to some ingredient in the Smarties. And, by the way, in case you were wondering, there IS no high to be had from snorting Smarties.


Then, I have to wonder, what will this new fad cause for sensible folks like me, who only purchase the Smarties for their intended purpose? Will they start keeping the Smarties behind the counter, with the meth-making decongestants? Will we be carded in order to purchase Smarties? Will salespersons have a red button to push when someone purchases mass quantities of Smarties at Halloween? I hate to think that I will be inconvenienced or penalized because of the ridiculous behavior of these pre-teens. I love my Smarties, but, gee, I thought you were supposed to EAT them! Doh!


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